once upon a time i was a young college student who did what young college students sometimes do. attended houseparties and consumed mass quantities of alcohol and acted stupid with my friends. some of our buddies had gone up to phoenix to college while some of us stayed in tucson. if there was a good party in either place, it was always a good excuse for a roadtrip for the weekend.

 

one night one of our crowd was having a bash, so the phoenix guys came down and brought some girls with them. one of them was absolutely gorgeous. awesome young body, with an incredible tan that was developed by laying by the pool in the arizona sun instead of going to class. she was beautiful and she knew it. however, turns out she was sweet as hell too. but we\\\'ll get to that.

 

one of the guys that we crossed paths with was kinda a jerk. had to be the center of attention. some guys can be like that and can pull it off. they\\\'re not malicious about it. they make everyone feel good. they tell good stories, they remember details... you want to like them. this guy wasn\\\'t that way. long, boring stories. if you weren\\\'t paying attention to him, he\\\'d find someone to pick on to make people pay attention to him. at one point he faked going to a rehab clinic and a couple serious illnesses for sympathy. just a weird, weird guy. further example of why parents should hug their kids when they\\\'re young.

 

so of course this guy has to get hot girl to pay attention to him. everytime she tries to break free he launches into some new story. at one point a cat wakes up and decides to come into the living room to see what\\\'s going on. the guy goes on and on about how she\\\'d better stick close to him because the cat\\\'s vicious and he\\\'ll keep her safe. all these stupid made up stories about how the cat\\\'s killed people and blah-blah-blah. about this time i tune out and go back to my wall flower routine. enjoying the beer, the music and the company of my fellow wall flowers.

 

i don\\\'t know how much time goes by, but all of a sudden i hear someone screaming my name. \\\"man, what the f**k are you doing? quit staring at her ass! she\\\'s a person damnit, not an object!\\\" and so on and so forth. turns out hot girl had bent over to pick up something she\\\'d knocked over. and had stopped paying attention to the one person who can\\\'t take that. the cat had made another circle through the room and so i said something stupid about how it looked like the cat was about ready to pounce on her and how we all knew he was really a big gutless wonder and so i was just getting ready to save her. it was stupid, but everyone was sick of the guy and she knew i wasn\\\'t checking her out so there was appropriate finger pointing and snickering at him.

 

a couple hours later the crowd had thinned out and mellowed. we were out of music but i\\\'d just gotten duran duran\\\'s greatest hits and hadn\\\'t listened to it yet. so i put it on and he started making fun of me and the music. fair enough. when i was a kid and duran duran was first popular i\\\'d made fun of them to. for some reason ten years later though, their music clicked with me. so i ignored him and kept playing the music. it was getting late and things were breaking up, so he really started putting on the full court press on hot girl. she\\\'d had enough of it and decided to shut him down once and for all. \\\"rio\\\" came on. she jumped up, exclaimed how much she loved the song and started dancing around the room. climbed up on top of the table and started putting on a show for the crowd, then ended up in front of me and finished the song out with a little lapdance just for me. ended the song by sitting in my lap and giving me the biggest kiss ever. gave me a wink and then turned around to see all the guys with their jaws dropped. center of attention boy got the hint. she\\\'s gotten him to stop taking stupid pot shots at me and and to leave her alone with one fell swoop.

 

here\\\'s for being in the right place at the right time.